Korean Adventure Part 1

I just got back two days ago from a grand adventure in the land of kimchi, cuteness, and computer games. Korea was ridiculously awesome. It wasn't my first time going, but I still learned a lot of new stuff about Seoul. I stayed in a really great little hostel called Kim's Guest House. Basically, for about $15 USD per night you get a nice, clean place to stay, a built in group of travellers to make friends with, and a source of advice for places to eat, visit, etc. And you can do laundry. I cannot stress enough how great of a choice this place turned out to be.

Anyway, in Korea I got to make a lot of observations. Seoul is similar to Tokyo in some ways. At least, they are both competely packed with people. However, where Tokyo is ridiculously clean and full of people mostly filling upper-level business roles (the subway is a sea of suits in the morning), Seoul is more littered and raw, and it has a wildness to it. Unfortunately, my Korean is horrible, although I can say the most basic things, but even when you speak to Koreans in english, they are much more direct. In Japan, you undergo a sort of dance of politeness, but in Korea it's straight out there.



Koreans in general seem to be a little more willing to confront one another, although also more willing to befriend you. Similar to Tokyo though, Seoul is very safe. The way shops are set up and people leave goods lieing around unattended (in one case I went to a shop with a sign detailing who to call if you wanted to make a purchase), it is clear that nobody fears theft much. When I say willing to confront, I don't mean that I've felt intimidated or unsafe at any time.

Korean daily life is pretty different from Japan. There are a lot of internet cafes in Tokyo, but not like Seoul. They're called PC Bangs there (bang meaning room), and they are everywhere. Most of them are roughly $1 USD per hour as well, so it's a pretty convenient stop. I kept seeing a weird game called Sudden Attack that was a Counterstrike clone with required registration to play, but other than that the game loadout was a mix of the regulars, such as all the flavors of Warcraft and Starcraft, and a ton of interesting Korean games such as Mabinogi.

The registration thing brings up a good point. From what I've read and found out from talking to others, it appears as if the Korean internet culture is really unique. If you don't know, Korea has the single highest rate of broadband connectivity in the world, with literally 25% of all Koreans with high-speed connections. Being a somewhat small nation, a huge number of Koreans are all on the Cyworld network, something like a 3rd or 4th generation social networking site, with tons of extras such as avatars, rooms, decorations, etc. Just to register, you have to either be a citizen or have an alien registration card. That is, in general, all members of the site will be real people with verified information. This, coupled with the near universal participation, results in a close-knit community where everybody knows everybody elses' business. My friend from Paris, whom I met during the trip, says that at one point a girl that he had been dating had gotten mad and posted something untruthful about him on her hompy (the Korean way to shorten the word homepage), and he ended up getting almost blackballed within his social network, with people he has never met before calling him up and harassing him even weeks later, after the girl he dated removed the information.

Clearly it is not without its problems, this kind of internet harassment is common in Korea, but I think the very close integration of social networking on the internet into Korean society provides a glimpse into the future. In Korea, internet savviness is common, and the utility and function of the internet as an organizer and facilitator of actual real life relationships is fully realized. In colleges in the United States, of course everybody facebooks one another, but this is like the next step. I've heard it said that a Korean person would rather go hungry than eat alone, and the internet has been fully integrated into the process of achieving this type of fundamental need for human connection.

In other aspects of Korean culture, there is a sort of fierce pride. Korea as a nation has worked to become a productive and powerful player in the international economy, and has succeeded thanks to its main corporations, Samsung and LG. As such, many Koreans are quick to talk about how great Samsung and LG are, and many drive Hyundais, a Korean car, rather than Japanese cars. Unfortunately, Korean pride often results in competition between whose company is better, Samsung versus Sony. This brings up another important point.

In Korea, anti-Japanese sentiment is fairly common. The result of both Japan's transgressions during World War II and horrible foreign policy decisions on the part of the Japanese government, namely having the Prime Minister visit the Yasukuni shrine each year, where war criminals are memorialized, there is lasting resentment on the part of the Korean people. Perhaps I will make a better update to my previous racism post in Japan to clarify the way it works, but in general, most of the Japanese I come into contact with, young people, students, and those looking to study foreign languages, harbor no resentment for Koreans. That being said, racism towards Koreans and Chinese in Japan DOES exist, in a somewhat hidden fashion. In Korea however, anger towards the Japanese is fairly common.

While out drinking, most of the Korean college students I've met have made their dislike of Japan fairly clear fairly quickly, upon hearing that I've just come from there. However, this is more of a sort of generalized dislike, and not openly acted upon in public, so I have heard from many Japanese tourists in Korea that have had perfectly good times. Despite personally getting kicked out of one club for attempting to communicate in Japanese, (something I've been assured is very rare) I've had a lot of good times out drinking in Korea as well.

Which brings me to yet another important point. The role of drinking in both Korea and Japan is something many foreigners may have trouble understanding. In Japan and Korea, people who say they don't drink do not exist. There are those who abstain of course, but there is no straight edge movement or anything like that, because drinking is a part of the social mechanism. I will go more in-depth into how it works in Japan later, but in Korea, alcohol greases the gears of the social process, and as such everybody participates. Drinking is even more vital than in Japan, and as a result many Koreans are STRONG drinkers. I consider myself a strong drinker, but in Korea its common to just sit around drinking from a glass of straight tequila. That's fierce.



One area where Korea's feeling of untamedness starts to come into play is when you go shopping. Absolutely everything MUST be bargained for. I couldn't even imagine bargaining in Japanese, but in Korea, even in the duty-free shops at the airport, I couldn't imagine not bargaining. Shopping in Korea is some of the greatest fun I've had there, and a really different experience from anything I've experienced in the US or in Japan. However, I will leave that discussion for my next blog post in the Korea series.

Sweet Merciful Lord

Why is it that wherever I go there is always some political group or other screaming through loud-speakers at 7 o'clock in the morning right under my window!? As if the constant earthquakes, the train station 40 feet from my door, and the violently loud footsteps of my neighbors weren't enough.

Sex for Sale

Before I get into this post, I want to make one thing clear. I have had it with these motherfucking earthquakes in motherfucking Tokyo! After a few days of frequent, minor earthquakes, I thought everything was finished for awhile. Either the big one would hit and I'd be posting this from a pile of rubble, or the ground would stop shaking and let me sleep for five damn minutes in peace. But no, that would be too easy. The earthquakes abated for awhile last month, but recently started up again, so now EVERY SINGLE TIME I fall asleep a little earthquake hits, waking me up.

Of course, were disaster to strike, I have a rigorous preparedness routine already in place.

1. Wake up, somewhat confused.
2. Come to the realization that the house is shaking.
3. Wonder whether or not this will get worse and I'll need to collect my most precious belongings (my computer) and flee.
4. Assume it won't and go back to sleep.

If it finally happens, expect to get your first glimpses of post-apocalyptic Tokyo right here.

Having gotten that out of the way, this post is going to be continuing with last post's theme of hot, filthy sex. However, this time the sex is between consenting adults, one of which is getting paid for it!

Keep in mind, I live a little ways outside of the main city area of Tokyo. Shibuya is right near the center of it, both physically and culturally. When you see movies or images of Japan, with large billboards and giant screens and masses of people, Shibuya is often featured. If you saw the latest Fast and the Furious (which you really shouldn't), much of the movie takes place right there. Shibuya is pretty much the core of youth culture in Tokyo. Right in front of the station, near the Hachi Kou dog statue, the entire area is usually crowded with all the colorful different tribes of Tokyo, from the ridiculously sexy, high-class, materialistic girls, identifiable by their ridiculously expensive brands, flawless hairstyles, and their total lack of interest in you (or anybody else not pulling in investment banker salaries), to the punk style, hooded-shawl wearing girl in necktie and platforms. Then there are the people with blue hair. As always, weaving in and out of the crowd are a healthy population of foreigners, the tourists usually looking around sort of confused and amazed, and the regulars usually trying to get some ass. It's really fun to watch, especially when you see a new tribe pop up. I think I saw the founding member of the white frosted tip hair and Napoleon Dynamite-style moonboots club. Normally I would've tagged him for later tracking, but I had forgotten my gun that night.

At any rate, I recently found myself in Shibuya to meet one of my students for a lesson, but I had arrived too early and had some time to kill. I hung around a bit right near the station, checking things out, but ended up wandering. Shibuya is all money and style, with large buildings, artistic architecture, billboards, etc, and once you get to the adult parts, it's still Shibuya-style. Many of the love hotels, where people head with a partner for some quick, discreet, action, and sex-related shops are situated in the same area, just beyond a large archway with a gigantic image of Pac-Man on it. In Shibuya, the love hotels end up looking more like sex castles. This place is also completely awesome, because you'll see tons of people coming out that you know just fucked. Also all the arcades are right nearby.

So naturally, I'm on my way there, not even to the arch yet, just around the corner from the station, and I pass a girl in a grey sweater. I couldn't tell her age at all because she didn't seem that old but she just looked worse for the wear. Like she'd been through a lot of shit and it left her looking sort of beat up and tired. She was standing there as I passed, and sort of staring at me. Now, in Japan, the reactions you'll get vary, from people who are openly amazed to see you, mouth agape, staring at the foreigner, to girls that are interested who give you the inviting look, to, what you'll most often encounter in Tokyo, the I don't give a shit, I'm not interested in looking at you at all reaction. This girl wasn't giving any of those looks. In some countries, prostitutes yell at you to get your attention. In Amsterdam, they would just stand in the window, mostly naked, and gesture to you. This girl just gave a look, the I will fuck you for money look. Running the gamut of prostitution advertisement approaches, you could call it very subtle and restrained, but in terms of Japanese body language and social norms, it was like she had a neon sign pointing to her tits.

I moved on past her, a bit strapped for time and also not really that interested in paid sex with somebody that looks like they fell into a meat grinder. I quickly took in a cheap, low-quality meal at my favorite shitty donburi chain restaurant, Yoshinoya, then crossed the street to arcade-and-sex town. I saw two teams of high-school kids, girlfriends nearby, playing this awesome-looking Gundam game, where you each control your own robot and battle each other in a city where the buildings magically take no damage from bullets, rockets, or laser swords. I got to see a ton of girls in short skirts, and I passed a love hotel with some guy actually screaming inside. If you've ever played Killer 7 and remember when you're in your trailer and there are people just screaming like they're being tortured, that's pretty much exactly it. Somewhere, balls were being tortured.

Eventually though, deep into the place, I started hitting all the low quality, cheap love hotels. The grey, non-descript buildings that feature their low hourly rates right on the front, on regularA4 printer paper. Actually, that's all they feature. These love hotels have no names or brands, they are just boxes for having sex in. That's when I came upon something amazing. It was a sex-themed cafe/bar where every single piece of furniture or decoration, down to the ashtrays, wash shaped like a penis or a vagina. I took some pictures here:





Satisfied with my discovery, and ready for my lesson, I turned back towards the station, when who should I encounter but my favorite member of the wildlife of the cheap-sex forest, beat-up hooker girl! This time, she had a new friend, a tubby little bearded guy, who was pretty animated about something. She gave me another look, this time it was the, this could've been you about to fuck me for money look. Then they disappeared together into the love hotel with the cheapest advertised rate, a big 3,500 right on the front. Isn't that sweet.

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How to Tell When Your Boss Is Trying to Sleep With You

From Somebody Who Knows

The world's turned a bunch of times and a lot has happened since I last updated. Japan's gotten a new prime minister, the rights of Americans have once again been massively eroded, the Republican party has become the official child molestation party, and I've gotten something dangerously close to resembling a job! Oh, and my boss has been trying in increasingly desperate ways to have sex with me. But let's rewind things for a moment.

So a few weeks back, I got to play this little mini-concert for an english school that teaches through songs. It's a pretty good idea, and I'd guess it works, judging by how well some of the kids could speak. They found me on one of the many english teacher freelancer websites I've been whoring myself on, and noticed that I mentioned my ability to play guitar. Without much preparation, they brought me out and we ran through Amazing Grace for the crowd, don't ask me why that song in particular, just it was simple and I knew most of the words. I also won a tongue twister contest in Japanese just after! At any rate, I suppose the show could be considered a success, because the owner of the music school scheduled me for a full week of teaching at 2500 yen per lesson. That's a three to five lessons a day ranging from 50 minutes to an hour each at a rate of a bit over $20 US. For the first time in a LONG time I've not just broken even, but I've turned the tide of my spending!

The lessons have been fun, and the Japanese kids I have to sing for are RIDICULOUSLY adorable. The school is very far from where I live, but in response to the long commute I've developed some highly effective time usage tactics, including setting up Google reader, which I HIGHLY recommend for its ease of use aggreggating your news feeds both for viewing on the computer and formatted viewing on your mobile phone. Seriously, if you use bloglines, or any other method of collecting your feeds, you'd be doing yourself a favor to try out Google Reader as well. In addition to enabling constant satiation of my information addiction, I've been loading my psp with various podcasts, including diggnation and the penny arcade casts (they've started up again!) and every flavor of tetris available, from both NES incarnations, to the SNES Tetris and Dr. mario game.

I love me some tetris.

Moving on, either it was my highly attractive tetris rockstar skills or my charmingly retarded Japanese speaking that led my boss, in her mid-40's or so, to repeatedly try to violate me. A bulleted list draws near!

Ways to tell your boss is trying to sleep with you:

• Takes you out to lunch and acts strangely clingy and overly sad when it's time to get back to work
  
• Begins good-naturedly bumping you and touching you, all the time
• Drops hints about wanting to separate work and private relationships
  
• Puts her finger in your mouth when you yawn, unsettling you greatly
• Awkwardly attempts to interject the word sperm into conversation, perhaps under the guise of having misheard it
• Begins inviting you to very expensive dinner cruises and shows, and, bizarrely, horseback riding
• Generously offers you a place to stay
• Generously offers you a place to stay in her house
• Asks for a kiss
• Tells you she wants to sleep with you (in my case, she went one further and directly declared that some time in the near future S & M would be happening, regardless of my opinion on the matter)

This has led to quite a bit of creepiness at the workplace. She seems to generally be a good person, and, of course, I am an utter whore, but she's been coming on REALLY strong, and it's begun to creep me out a little. I found out recently from immigration that I would have no choice but to leave the country soon as part of the process of receiving a work visa. My boss's response? She immediately offered to travel with me to New York City, where we would stay in a hotel together and I would show her around. She's been overly generous and generally acting as if we are a LOT closer than we actually are. Actually, she's been acting as if I were her boyfriend. Maybe this is some type of common female boss management style and I'm just getting caught in the cultural difference here? Either way, I don't much like people sticking their fingers in my mouth while I yawn.